This past weekend was one of the happiest of my life. Knox and I spent 3 days in and around a city we love, we spent one of those days with Urs and Ingmar, and we even got to meet Delia, the egg donor. And, of course, there was the actual embryo transfer. It was incredibly fast and painless, though a little awkward and considerably less fun than traditional procreation. Afterward I got to spend almost an entire day relaxing in a quiet hotel room with Knox, a good book, and a terribly addicting game.
Right after arriving in the city, Knox and I headed over to the offices of the surrogacy agency to get a little tour and meet some of the people I’ve been emailing back and forth with these last few months. We even happened to meet the company’s founder and president, a really cool guy whose own child was born through surrogacy nearly twenty years ago. While waiting for Urs and Ingmar to arrive, we got to spend about an hour getting to know my journey coordinator, the person I’m in contact with most at the agency. She was very smart and friendly (as she had been on the phone and in emails) and it was so great to chat with her.
Knox, the guys, and I met at the agency and then went out for lunch at a cute little Italian place. We exchanged small gifts; they gave me a beautiful coffee table book about traditional homes where they live, and I gave them a brie baker and a children’s book about the state we live in. From there we headed to a museum, and later we met up with Delia for bowling and dinner.
I got to talk to her a little about how she decided to become an egg donor and how she knew she wanted to work with Urs and Ingmar. Delia has worked in health services and seen couples deal with the terrible struggle of infertility. She wanted to ease that struggle for someone. And she knew she wanted her contribution to go to loving people. That was her primary requirement: that they be loving. She said she could tell immediately that Urs and Ingmar were the right Intended Parents for her eggs. I totally agree with her. It’s not every day you meet a couple who not only adore each other, but exude love and kindness toward everyone around them. Urs and Ingmar are so genuine, enthusiastic, and good. After spending some time with them I am more proud than ever to be helping them start a family.
And it’s no mystery why they chose Delia from the pool of egg donors. I’m not exaggerating Delia’s beauty when I say that she looks like Iman. Yeah, she’s that gorgeous. And if the previous paragraph doesn’t convince you of her kindness, I don’t know what could. She’s also smart and articulate; I liked her a lot. According to my journey coordinator, it’s extremely unusual for the Intended Parents, Egg Donor, and Gestational Carrier to all spend time together. Usually the egg donor is anonymous and/or has very little contact with the parents; our case was the first she’d ever heard of an egg donor and carrier actually meeting each other. I’m so glad we all had the opportunity to get to know each other as a group. We all have the same goal in mind: the birth of at least one healthy baby.
Speaking of babies, I maybe be growing one or two right this very minute! The earliest I can take a home pregnancy test is this weekend. There is some risk of a false negative, though, and the results won’t be official until my blood test next week. And then, if the test is positive, it will be another couple of weeks before I have the initial ultrasound to find out whether we’ve got one or two babies in there. Urs and Ingmar made it clear that the most ideal outcome for them would be boy/girl twins. I said I’d do my best to accommodate! At the transfer the doctor who performed the procedure told me a little about the embryos. 3 days after insemination, they were both grade three. One had 6 cells, and one had 7. Knox asked the probability of twins, and she said given the age of the egg donor (29) she’d guess at a 40-50% chance that both embryos will implant.
Anyway, I’ll be over the moon if there’s one pre-baby growing in there, and doubly amazed if there are two!